Self introduction
Subject: self-introduction
Dear Professor Blackstone,
I hope after reading this letter you will get to know more about me. I previously studied Mechanical Engineering at Singapore Polytechnic specializing in precision engineering. Since young my dad and friends have always talked about automobiles which influenced me to want to find out more about them. The more I research about it, the more I find them interesting like how they work and how technologies have improved to make the product better than before. This interest made me decide to take on an engineering course in Polytechnic.
One weakness I have in communication is talking to strangers or people I am not close with. One example is that I feel uneasy when I have to speak in front of the class or strangers. I can be very expressive and fun when talking to people I am close with but once I have to talk to people I do not know I will not be myself and find it hard to say what I had planned. This is something I want to improve on through this module as this is something critical in my career in the future. My strength is that I am a good listener, I will take my time to listen to what others have to say and analyze it. Most of my friends will find me to talk to when they need a listening ear to rant or just when they want to let things out. I may not give the best advice when needed but I am always there when they need me.
In this module, I want to get better in terms of writing and talking. I usually speak in Mandarin when I am with my family or friends so I always have a hard time whenever I need to write or talk in a more formal setting.
Yours sincerely
Law Ken
This looks interesting, Ken!
ReplyDeleteI'll write in more detail once your blogging buddies have given you feedback.
By the way, there red font is a bit hard to read. Would you consider making it white?
Thank you!
Hi Ken! Its nice getting to know you! Aside from what Professor blackstone has said about the text colour, I think you've done remarkable work so far and it is really nice getting to know you! I think that some of the sentences could be phrased better in the second paragraph but other then that, great job!
ReplyDeleteGreat introduction, Ken. Your passion for automobiles and how it led you to engineering is clearly conveyed. It would improve readability if you organized your thoughts into separate paragraphs. Looking forward to working with you in the future.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGood day Ken!
ReplyDeleteOverall, your letter is well-written and provides a clear insight into your background, interests, strengths, and areas for improvement. The language used is formal and appropriate for a communication module. The flow of content is logical, starting with your educational background, passion for automobiles, and then addressing your communication strengths and weaknesses. It's great that you openly acknowledge your challenges and express a desire for improvement, demonstrating self-awareness. Additionally, your commitment to enhancing your communication skills and addressing language challenges in formal settings is commendable. This letter effectively conveys your thoughts and sets a positive tone for the module.
Keep it up!
Robin
Dear Ken,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this clear, concise and informative letter. You address the key components of the brief and provide just enough details. For instance, it's clear in the post that you appreciate automobiles, and this interest has led to you wanting to make engineering a profession.In addition, you describe your ability to listen to people, an area of your communication that comes in handy when bonding with friends. I do wonder how this could apply in a professional context, for example, when you are interacting with strangers who you feel a bit intimidated by.
Thanks also for sharing on your usual use of Mandarin. That means you are effectively bilingual, which is of huge value. In tjis letter you show effective language fluency, but there are a couple issues to consider:
1. sentence structure
-- Since young my dad and friends have always talked about automobiles which influenced me to want to find out more about them. > (dangling modifier: "Since young" refers to your dad and his friends? No, of course. Then how to clarify this?)
2. word use
-- The more I research about it, the more I find them interesting.... > (inconsistent use of pronouns: Does "it" or "them" more accurately align with automobiles?) ?
3. overuse of caps
-- studied Mechanical Engineering
-- in Polytechnic
I look forward to learning more about you this term.
Cheers,
Brad